Introduction

Hi, I have lived a complicated life in short amount of years. I have had everything and then lossed it all. I have faced massive depression and confusion leading to many days locked in my closet crying my eyes out. I have kept a personal journal in the bottom drawer of my nightstand to write in. It captures my memories, losses and such and now I will bring those words spoken by me as a young child to the young adult I now am unto you, my reader.


I was eight-years-old when I wrote my first entry. I pretty much just jotted down anything that came to mind in little random spurts. After much filtering, I have now come to a short summary of that first entry.

I was in the third grade at a k-8 school called Littleton Academy. We had to wear uniforms there but, as a young child, I didn't care much about fashion anyways. We were to wear a plaid or navy blue skirt or kaki or navy blue pants or shorts and a red, navy blue, hunter green, yellow or white polo shirt. I remember calling my best friend early in the morining saying "I'm wearing a red polo shirt and plaid skirt today." When we arrived at school, she would be wearing the same thing. I would join my my many other friends at recess and play fun games of jump rope and "midgets". We all pretended we were babies and had one mommy who was the tallest girl in the third grade. I was usually the naugty little baby that never followed orders.

In school, I was above average in most of my classes although I neglected to do my homework a good part of the time. I still ended up with good grades and was ready to pass the quarter. I was in the highest language arts class partly because of my love of reading at an early age. I remember that I was the one sitting with my legs crossed and book opened across my lap in my spare time in the classroom. This moment brings back memories of first grade.

I was born premature so I was rather small. I was pretty darn cute (not to toot my own horn). I also had a twin brother who was put in the other homeroom. If he would have been put in the same one, things could've turned out way different for me. Well, all the girls wanted to be my friend and they wanted to hold me like a little baby doll. I also had really long hair that they were all very jealous of. The boys liked me a lot, too. To get back to that memory, I was sitting cross-legged in my reading class scanning the pages of a book with my eyes. All of a sudden, a boy jumped over me and then another and then another. They had made a little game out of jumping over the smallest girl in the class. I enjoyed this and took my friendships and popularity for granted. I never thought I'd lose any of it for I didn't know about the impending events that were to come in a few more years...